Hmm...

Crap! I found a whole bunch of my little posty notes about things I wanted to blog about.. and I just never got the chance! They've just been piling up and piling up! :s
Here's a few of them anyway, they're the most recent... from last weekend. There's atill a few more, and they'll make there way here ... one day.

Not that anyone will read it, haha Candace, I'm pretty sure you've given up all hope on me, seeing as I never post any fun-ness anymore :(

Room Flooding Retards:
*note: most of this was all buddy, I feel bad for the chick, cuz man, was this guy dumb! He was your classic 'I can throw a football 5000 yards and still have time to make to the opposite end to catch it..... but 2 + 2 = 22' guy*

1)"Uhh, I ordered champage for my room, and the gentleman said the bar wasn't open yet.. so we went out and came back, and we still don't have any champage"
*send waitress down with champage here* then cue buddy stomping back down the hall, bottle in hand.
"I can't get this bottle open! I've tried and tried, and it's not opening, why wasn't it opened for us when it was brought down!?"
"Well, it's a twist top... you have to twist it, not pop it..."
"What kind of champage is this?! Is it going to make me sick?! I know champage, and I've never seen a twist off top"
Oh, you know champagne do you... you probably couldn't manage to take a piss by yourself before last week, but YOU KNOW champagne..

2) "We're very upset.. we can't get the water to stay in the jacuzzi!"
"Well, did you make sure the plug was in properly?"
"Uhh, no, there's a plug? Well, where would it be?"
Most likely, somewhere on the side of the jacuzzi, if it's not attatched to that little hole where the water goes down, sometimes people like to call it a drain? - honestly, do these people not have a bath tub at home? I mean, they are from Ohio.. but come on!

3) "We put the tub on then stepped outside quickly to have a smoke, and when we came back the jacuzzi was 'leaking' water was shooting everywhere there clothes were all soaked, and his cell was ruined"
After they were done bitching about their own stupidity, they got a cab and went out. So I sent the night cleaner down to see if he could clean up the mess for them, since they were morons, and I didn't want to move them to another room.... not to mention they didn't ask me to, so why should I reward stupid.

Well, he wasn't kidding about the soaked part.. EVERYTHING was soaked. The room phone was ruined, and kept calling the desk (even while there was no one in the room) the lamp on the table across from the tub was literally dripping water out of the bottom, the wall paper on the back wall by the tub was all rippled and pulling away from the wall, and the carpet (after filling the shove-vac, and dumping it twice) was still sopping. Not to mention they had been smoking like fiends in there, when they clearly requested a NONSMOKING room...
(and to try to fix his cell problem, he had it jammed into the heater, to I guess dry it out, I'm sure that will help..)

* And the best part... my manager (who is completely ball-less by the way) decided that even with all the water and smoke damage that they weren't going to be charged clean-up fees because "you can't charge someone for being stupid" .... If anything that's all the MORE reason to charge them! $250 clean-up fee + $100 stupidity fee! *

Then there was the little whore who was staying in room 222. When I checked her in, she seemed normal.. and when I say normal I mean being all sickly sweet kissy face with the thing she had with her that she called a man.. but anyway..
Then the phone calls started coming in..
"Um, can you tell me if there's a [Mrs. Blank] staying in your hotel?"
which there was, so I asked if he wanted to be connected to her room..
"First can you tell me if she's there with a man?"
I'm sorry sir, I can't give out any information of that nature, did you want me to connect you to her room?
"Well, she's my wife, and I suspect that she's at your hotel cheating on me with another man"
Like I said sir, I can't give you any such information... but I'll connect you to her room.

Long story short, [Mr. Blank] continued to call ALL weekend long, with no luck at getting in touch with the slut. But on his final try, left the greatest message with the Night Auditor.
"Could you just let me wife know when she checks out in the morning, that her husband has been calling, and that I hope she's been having a good time with her lover and that I'll see her when she gets home."
Ahhh this made my life like nothing other! And you know me, I was the one that got to deliver the message, and I made sure she got it! The look on her face, I wish I had a camera! Instant white and sick to her stomach looking .. oh words can not describe!

I can tell you now, it's going to be a long summer! The idiots have already started back full force (seeing as they never really left) and to top it off, they've hired back the old manager - the one that worked there for like 12 years, left 2 years ago because he got pissed over being laid off for the winter. Swore he'd never come back.. only to come crawling back begging for a desk job, due to the fact that he just got laid off from his other job (and not to mention he smells of stale cigarettes, which is lovely) He basically reminds me of a tall creepy pedophile man with horrid odor.

Plus to top it all off, I'm still houseless :(
I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

P.S.
If anyone is interested in buying some art... take a look, but NO stealing!